


A Soft Heart

by Edosian_Orchid



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Angst, Developing Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-31
Updated: 2019-01-30
Packaged: 2019-10-19 17:04:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17605364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Edosian_Orchid/pseuds/Edosian_Orchid
Summary: Dr Bashir and Garak have their weekly lunch date.





	A Soft Heart

It was their usual weekly lunch date and they were half-way through their meals, or as Bashir had to admit, he was almost finished while Garak gracefully seemed to savour each bite. Their usual debate over the week’s literature exchange was smoothly transpiring in a normal fashion. Bashir was mid-way through a small rant about his disfavour for how each expression of love that was not aimed towards the state led to the protagonists’ downfall in the Cardassian novel Garak had lent him, when his mind started to wander. He thought about how each sentence had held such tremendous anticipation and fear of breaking whatever it was that had brought them together during the first year of acquittances. How he had turned each word Garak had said around in his mind, trying to find a hidden meaning. Trying to understand what had brought the spy to take up interest in him. Thriving on that spark of danger that never quite left him when he was in Garak’s presence.

Now so many years later, his nervous rambles occurred much less frequent and rather than danger there was a timbre of warmth quietly burning whenever he was in the tailor’s presence. A calm fire he somewhat consciously made sure never got enough oxygen to flame up to the supernova he feared lurked beneath. Was he even Garak’s’ real friend? He remembered telling Dax how Garak of course was not his real friend so many years ago when his implant had malfunctioned. He had known it was a lie as soon as he had said it and he knew that it still was. Whatever sentiment Garak held for him, he knew without a doubt that he regarded Garak as a dear friend. Even though he still knew so little about the man. Even though what Garak had said to him when his implant had malfunctioned. Even though Garak had not cared that he was on the Founders’ planet when he had tried to commit genocide, almost killing him as well. Garak had tried to commit genocide and here they were sitting discussing the romantic subtext of the week’s novel. Garak was an enigma, his enigma, and that both soothed and frightened Bashir. Ending his rant about the fallen lovers in the novel he returned all his focus to the man before him. He discretely squirmed in his chair when he realized that Garak was studying him in that unnerving way that always made him wonder if he had been able to intercept his internal dialogue. As on queue Garak fired of that unnerving, knowing smile to him, sending a small shiver down his spine.

_My dear doctor, as I’ve told you before: sentiment is the greatest weakness of all. The novel merely highlights the purpose of a Cardassian life. It is not the propaganda you so carelessly accuse it to be. It is a lesson of what it means to be a true Cardassian._

Bashir let out a quiet sigh at that, wondering what misery in Garak’s clouded past that had led him to hold that view. During their years together, small pieces of the puzzle that was Garak had progressively been presented to him. That Tain had been his father still tore away at something deep within Bashir. He could not help to feel a great sadness for his friend, a deep ache that compelled him to comfort, to embrace. He rarely reached out though, because he knew it would not be welcomed. Instead he chose to offer a soft rebuke, the beginning of a dance that somewhere had become a second nature to their relationship.

_Garak, you have lived so many lives and yet you have missed the most important point… Having a soft heart in this cruel world is not a weakness, it is courage_. He made sure to deliberately twist his fork around in the air, punctuating his points in a way he knew would irritate Garak.

To his surprise, the playful scolding did not arrive immediately, instead Bashir felt how Garak regarded his face for a long moment, his usual mask of casual pleasantries still there, yet something Bashir could not quite place seemed to simmer under the surface. Bashir felt how he knit his eyebrows, trying to decipher that flicker in Garak’s eyes, that slight tightness in his smile. But just as quickly as it was there it was gone, and Bashir found himself wondering if it ever had been there at all. The quiet chuckle that followed startled him and he found himself blushing, just as he did so often all those years ago.

_You are likely the smartest man in the galaxy, yet the utter naivety you possess never seem to diminish, nor fail to astonish me. And quoting some obscure, romantic human poet, no doubt, how very you._ Garak gave a soft smile as he shook his head patronizingly at him. Bashir feigned annoyance in response and took a bite of his food to gain some time. The searching stare had somewhat frown him off his game.

_Oh, I am sure my naivety is part of my boyish charm._ Sending of a smug smile that highlighted the white of his teeth he put his head in his hand, leaning slightly over the table.

_My, my, I though we already established that it is not quite as boyish anymore._ Mischievous eyes twinkled at him as Garak dabbed away non-existing crumbles on his chin with his napkin, having finished his meal.

A different kind of heat settled in the pit of his stomach as they held their stares, and he quickly shut it down. That was something he could never allow himself to feel, analyse or even consider and yet he found it increasingly difficult to smother it. For a brief moment the desire to reach out and cover Garak’s hand with his own was almost overpowering, but he pushed it away. Gathering up his things he gave Garak an apologetic smile.

_Hm, I think that is up for debate. But I’m afraid it will have to wait. I must be getting back to the infirmary now. I’ll send you a new novel tonight, usual time next week?_ He found himself wishing that the polite disappointment in Garak’s face was sincere as he stood up and instantly scolded himself for his foolish thoughts.

_Of course, Doctor. I’m already looking forward to it._

**Author's Note:**

> Written as an outlet for my stress at the moment, not proofread so apologizes for mistakes. Garashir is one of my favorite pairings, their complex relationship held so much potential to be developed. If only the series had been made 25 years later. 
> 
> Having a soft heart in a cruel world is courage, not weakness. - Katherine Henson, I believe


End file.
